Teen star Ashley Tisdale jumped the plastic surgery shark and got herself a nose job! Did she pull an Ashlee Simpson and vastly improve herself or is she the new Jennifer Gray, who made herself virtually unrecognizable?

Either way, the dear girl’s former schnoz is forever enshrined in plastic! Her High School Musical doll mockingly retains the gal’s former profile and serves as a stinging-ever-lasting reminder of her pre-altered, beaky self. Bummer!

Maybe next time lass you ought to check with Disney marketing before you go and get nipped and tucked!

Buffy meets Fray in the upcoming Buffy #16!

‘Nuff said!

This freakin’ fantastic painting of beloved doofus Homer Simpson, as if by classical artist Rembrandt, is beyond terrific! LOVE IT! Check out this and other wonderfully creative artwork at www.limpfish.com.

So, how hard will Sarah Silverman and Matt Damon take it? Kimmel and Affleck may be a love for all time . . .

or

Heh heh . . .

Wow!  It seems sweet little Hayden Panettiere is going the way of the all the Britneys, Lindsays and Paris’ before her and sexying up her image in a bid to gain more Hollywood notoriety. But I have to wonder, is this such a good plan Hayden? Who are these ads geared towards, besides horny middle-age men wishing they could tap a piece of that?  

When will these teen starlets learn from the mistakes of the past? It seems that anytime a young girl makes the leap from talented kid actress/singer to sexed-up Lolita only bad, horrible stuff follows; underage drinking, drugs, random hook-ups, sex tapes, eating disorders, rehab, loss of creditability. Soon the “celebrity” is more famous for her hard-partying ways and personal traumas than her work as an actress/singer. I for one am totally sick of these girls who are famous just for being famous.

I hope this won’t be Hayden’s future, but judging by the steps she is emulating, I don’t have a good feeling. How long will it be before we see a snapshot of her ‘pom pom’ on the internet? Two weeks? Hopefully this is a minor bump in the road for Hayden’s Hollywood career and not an omen of things to come.

As a kid the Smurfs were my most favorite and most beloved cartoon series! I would get up at 6-mother-freakin’-AM every Sat. morning just to watch my cheery little blue friends scamper about in their many exciting and joyous adventures! I had, and still have on my desk at work (super nerd alert!), many of the little toy figures. I also posses a treasured Smurf binder given to me when I was 8 years old as a Valentine’s Day gift, and this amazing binder still holds all my drawing and doodles as a child. No other cartoon impacted me more; even to this dad my dad calls me anytime he sees something Smurf related.

So can I be anymore jazzed about the new 3-D Smurf movie coming out! OMG! I don’t think so! Seriously, I hope I don’t get hit by a truck before this movie makes it the big screen ‘cause this is the fulfillment of all my kiddie dreams (because, like, the first Smurf movie was utterly and completely horrendous! What was up with the singy-voices? Ugh! Sooo bad.). Bring on the movie baby, you know I’ll be waiting in line! Wheee!

I always find it funny as to what’s considered a dirty word where. Obviously, George Carlin has opined on it at length. Consider England, where the posters for “Austin Powers 2: The Spy Who Shagged Me” had to be censored. Today on, well, Today, Jane Fonda simply said the name of the piece that’s she reading without really thinking about it. That title . . .

The national hand-wringing has already begun. There’s shock! Outrage!

Incidentally, none of this has to do with the elections or the war, but hey, whatever takes up time on the news, I suppose.

So Lipstick Jungle debuts tonight, making it the second Sex and the City knock-off to appear is this strike-addled season. To be fair, Jungle is at least a knock-off by Sex creator Candace Bushnell (who appears to support the Joe Bob Briggs axiom that if you’re going to remake a movie, then remake the movie).

On the surface, the greatest difference between the programs would be that one has four women and one has three women. Jungle has played up the sex factor in their advertising; seriously, Kim Raver’s been on Third Watch, The Nine, and 24 and I don’t recall that I’ve ever seen as much of her breasts as I do in the picture above. Also, if you consider the way that the women are draped on each other, they’re clearly shooting for a male audience on the subliminal “chicks with chicks” level. Mafia, for its part, comes off in commercials as cold and stuffy. Or maybe that’s just Lucy Liu.

(more…)

Coming soon . . .

After Buffy the Vampire Slayer deserted me a few years ago I found myself lost, delirious, and helplessly longing for a show to satisfy my jonesing for scary good monster fun, and the superhuman peeps who fight and kill them. Thank the evil devils below that Supernatural, now in its spooky third season on the CW, existed to comf0rt me and ease me through my Buffy withdrawals.

Although the show has never replaced the humor, pathos, and wonderment of my dear Buffy, it has succeed in being a new, beloved entity all its own; offering gripping, intelligent, fright-filled episodes that never cease to delight and scare the shiz outta me! Much like Buffy, this show never seems to get the press, fan support, or newsworthyness it deserves. The show has as rich and as exciting mythology as Buffy, and it offers loads of human drama that manages to lift the basic premise past its monster of the week format.

Plus, mega hottie alert: the show has twisted “hunters” Dean Winchester, played by the smoldering sexy Jensen Ackles (yummy with a spoon!), and his kid bro Sam, sweet-faced Jared Padalecki, seeking out and saving people from the things that go bump in the night! With only three more episodes left until the writers’ strike is over, say it ain’t so, Supernatural needs to be treasured more than ever! If you haven’t seen an episode yet, totally download them on iTunes, ‘cause sexy evil chasers never go out of style!  

Over on Newsarama, Marc Guggenheim (WGA member) said the following:

“Speaking solely as a WGA member (and not a representative thereof), I’m not disappointed in Joe at all. He isn’t a member of the WGA (or the DGA, SAG or IATSE, for that matter) and, therefore, has no legal or moral obligation to honor the picket line. Nevertheless, he still solicited the opinion of at least one highly successful WGA member before committing to go on the show — a classy move, in my opinion, that he didn’t have to do.

Plus, did you notice the red WGA-solidarity wristband he wore?”

So, it appears that there are at least two WGA members that think it is OK to support the producers by helping them complete one of their shows by filling time as a guest. I give Mr. Guggenheim all the credit in the world for stating his opinion publicly and standing behind it as he has. But agreeing to appear on a show, when you have no contractual obligation, supports the producers by helping them to get new, compelling product out there. Sure, Quesada is not a big mainstream draw and someone else would probably step in, but that doesn’t excuse making the appearance.

But I want to know who this highly successful WGA member is and whether or not they are a current Marvel writer. I don’t want to support anyone who makes excuses for someone crossing a picket line. As far as comic book writers, that means no purchasing works by Guggenheim, thus far. I can only hope that the Skrull WGA member Joe spoke to will have the courage of his convictions to put his name to that advice so I can swear off purchasing their material as well.

Plus, did anyone notice the attempt to act like the red WGA-solidarity wristband that most of America has no recognition of might outweigh helping producers create a show without writers?

So, like, even though I am totally a 33 year old man I am so not ashamed to freely and openly admit that I am so loving the heck outta the new Care Bears cartoon on CBS’ Kewlopolis programming block. Like, how can I not? Hello! Any show that is lucky enough to be featured on a block of shows called “Kewlopolis” has gotta be way radical to, like, the max, right? I mean, “cool” isn’t even spelled the way old boring geezers do! Oh no, it’s spelled all “Kewl” with, like, a total “K” and “ewl” and junk, because, welp, it’s totally hip, totally now and, like, totally AWESOME!

Plus, who doesn’t love little furry bears with happy and colorful belly badges teaching positive life lessons? I mean, if I have to relearn my all my forgotten morals – like telling the truth (as if!) and sharing (lame!) - then I for sure want to be educated on them from Funshine Bear and his shiny, smiley sun belly badge of joy. Funshine Bear rocks out hard with his totally red skater hat too! Whoot whoot! He’s street and he’s sweet! Now that’s a winning combo! So don’t hate all you judgey judgersons! Care Bears kick fanny, embrace it! LOL!

The Biggest Loser takes reality TV to another level. Not only are they making people famous or infamous depending on their personality, they are changing lives. Many Americans today are very overweight and can’t overcome their weight problems on their own. The Biggest Loser is motivating people all over America to get up off their hind quarters and start exercising and living healthier lives.

This year the producers decided to take a different approach and have people compete in teams and not just as individuals. There were teams made up of best friends, newlyweds, former teammates, ex-husband and ex-wife, strangers, married couple, mother and daughter, mother and son, brothers, and father and daughter. Having someone there to support you in your efforts to become a healthier person is a great idea. Everyone needs motivation especially when facing such a hard task as these contestants.

The contestants on the show have inspired America to promise to lose more than one million pounds and they are keeping track of this number online. There have been people on this show whose life has been put in jeopardy due to their obesity. What started as a different reality TV show turned into a life changing and life saving masterpiece.

I just got around to watching Bravo’s overly-promoted new show Make Me a Supermodel (do we need another model show?) last night and I was surprised with openly gay contestant/model-in-training Ronnie and his blatant attempt at snagging some screen time by making plenty of “witty” remarks.  

The moment that cemented him as a “reality-star” was when he cheekily revealed the names of his mighty pectoral muscles - which he referred to as the “girls” - as Cher and Madonna. Oh my, what cleverness, and what better way to gain some gay street creed then by name-dropping two of the stereotypically gayest of gay icons? You go, Ronnie! Work those sound bites!  

I can get behind men naming their gonads (whose significant other hasn’t named their twig and berries?), but naming their chesty region? Perhaps its common place for women folk to have names heaved upon their breasts, but for men? Is this undiscovered territory for me or is giving a moniker to man-boobs the new cool?