I am shocked –SHOCKED, I say — that a network television show that manufactures pop music stars could be accused of ANY malfeasance.
EVER.
Pshaw!!!

Update!
Video of the sorry affair.

If you’re like me, and through the magic of Tivo haven’t quite gotten to the new episode of Lost that aired Thursday night, this may be useful for you. Even if you already watched it, there might be a couple things this reminds you of that you’d forgotten. That’s right, this is a recap of the entire series from episode 1.1 to episode 4.8, all in 4 minutes 24 seconds. Just amazing.

Who wants to be Paris Hilton’s best friend?

Thousands of people, apparently. The infamous heiress is choosing through the Internet several candidates who will compete against one another on her upcoming reality show “Paris Hilton’s My New BFF.” The winner is her new best friend, I guess. There have already been thousands of profiles and videos posted to ParisBFF.com by people who are interested in being on the show.

I could be wrong, but it seems a little arrogant to think that the whole world loves you so much that people are going to claw out the eyes of their opponents over who gets to be your best friend. And I don’t know about you, but I haven’t fought over best friend status since I was…seven.

It’s times like these that I almost become pro-censorship. Because a show like this not only cheapens the very idea of friendship, it allows things like this to surface on the Internet.

I lost hundreds of brain cells watching that clip. They are lost forever.

The Hoff received eye surgery today.

While he is indisposed, all of his Hoffly duties will be handled by Parker Stevenson.

Get well soon, sir!

Click the Newsarama banner for direct access to complete and continuous coverage of the New York Comic Con! We’ll try to post some links to top stories over the weekend, and perhaps offer some “Con Job” analysis. Newsarama already has video interviews with Dan Didio covering James Robinson on Justice League, Legion of 3 Worlds, Final Crisis, Batman: R.I.P., and more.

That was painful to watch, and I blame neither candidate for it, really, the Republican OR the Democrat.
The less people see of that performance by ABC News, the better.

Granted, this one is kind of like shooting fish in a barrel. And that’s actually appropriate, given that this one is all about shooting.

The first two lines:

“I Got My Sights Set On You
And I’m Ready To Aim”

All right, kid. I don’t mean to break your assuredly achy-breaky heart, but having your sights set on someone means that you’re already aiming. This would be akin to The Beatles singing:

And I, I tell you something,
I wanna hold your hand that I’m already holding

Or perhaps, Color Me Badd:

I wanna sex you up as we’re sexing

You see my point.

(Please note: Yes, it’s satirical.)

Rock the Cradle premiered on MTV last night, and it was interesting. First off, let me say, go Jesse Blaze Snider! Woo!

Anyway, taking a look at the show, it was a good time, and it was interesting seeing a HUGE range of talent. For example, Chloe Lattanzi, daughter of Olivia Newton-John, wouldn’t make it to Hollywood on American Idol. Steve Walsh of the Eagles’ daughter  Lucy Walsh was incredible, and really deserved the “protected” spot.

The judging is all over the place, with judges rarely agreeing across the board- that’s perfect. It means they’re actually giving their individual opinions and EVERYone has different opinions. I don’t mind that at all, though I did quickly figure out who I’ll be agreeing with, and that Belinda Carlyle is batshit crazy. Although, she was right on Lil B Sure, as he was not the “best vocal performance of the night” like Larry Rudolph said- he was flat on 2 of his last three notes, but I digress.

Then there’s the host, Ryan Devlin. Wow, was this guy terrible. He has no charisma, he is NOT funny, his delivery was off, his timing was off when coming back to him, and he had his head and neck cocked forward the ENTIRE show- it was painful to watch, and bad enough that I fast forwarded (thank you tivo!) every time he spoke and someone else wasn’t around.

Don’t worry if you missed it, there’s something like 10 showings of the first episode in the next 3 days alone. It’s worth taking a look at, and I have a feeling once the first couple cullings take place and we get rid of the crap, the competition should get interesting.

Quick bits on every competitor after the break: (more…)

Holy Smokes, ya’ll! Cartoon Network just announced a brand-spanking new Batman cartoon series coming 2008! It’s called Batman: The Brave and the Bold and it’s a take on the classic Batman comic book series, by the same name (but without the Batman part), where our caped crusader teams up with a different DCU hero each week! Yay! This is pretty darn awesome!

With the recent end The Batman cartoon on Kid’s WB it sure is nice to see that DC still has some terrifically fun and exciting ideas up their sleeves to keep their characters alive and well in the cartoon world! Plus, is that modern day Blue Beetle in the pic with Bats and classic Green Arrow? Why, yes it sure is! With Wolverine and the X-Man, Iron Man, and the current Spectacular Spiderman, it looks like this could be the year of the comic book cartoons! Bring on the fun!

Ahoy! Shots in the Dark IS the official podcast of Shotgun Reviews, so we thought we’d hit you up with an all review episode (after the Gatling Geek news segment, of course). We went a little outside the box, though. First, Janelle reviews The Sims 2: Freetime, the likely final expansion pack to The Sims 2, and even gives you a sneak peak of The Sims 3, due out next year.  Then we take a deep look at the first 7 “episodes” of Warren Ellis and Paul Duffield’s FreakAngels; the completely free webcomic. Head over, take a listen, subscribe through any and all podcasting services, and be a better human being. Or Warren Ellis will send the arse eels. It’s your choice.

 Listen Right Here!!

I’ve been pondering what seems to me to be a big blunder: the Sex and The City film. However, I think that I’ve just heard of one that might be bigger: Kathie Lee Gifford will now be hosting the fourth hour of Today on NBC.

Let me rewind a minute: I liked Sex and The City. And I liked the end of the series, which essentially wrapped the characers in a nice little bow. By opening the story threads back up (and by shuffling off Big, one way or another, a fact that’s all but guaranteed in the trailer), the creators risk angering fans who felt like they had a complete run of tales capped by a fitting ending.

And that’s just part of it. Even at its peak, Sex didn’t have TV’s biggest audience. Granted, syndication has spread the audience a bit, but let’s look at the HBO numbers. During its final season, the show was regularly drawing 7.9 million viewers. An additional 3 million joined for the series finale. If we call the base audience 8 million, and call the base ticket price $10, then the studio needs to get every single one of those people in the door to make $80 million. Granted, that would be decent box office, but not an earthquake. Additionally, sources place the budget (pre-advertising) at $65 million. I suppose that it could break even, or function as a loss-leader for DVD sales. At the same time, you’re risking a lot of goodwill by undoing that “happy ending”.

What do you think?

Looks pretty badass if you ask me! Color me excited!

ABC’s new quirk-fest sitcom Miss Guided (get it, “Miss” because it’s about a female ex-nerd and “guide” because she’s a guidance counselor at her old High School, wow, what a zinger of a title!) is a show with loads and loads of potential, it practically screams “this show is funny, so laugh,” but the execution of all that potential left me feeling a mixture of “haha, this is kinda cute” and “eh, not that impressed”.

I certainly can’t blame the charming and enjoyable Judy Greer, who is always fantastic in any second-banana role she’s ever played in all her numerous second-banana roles (best-friend to hot-girl-movie-star mostly). Greer is very likable, adorable and strives to add every ounce of goofy facial expressions in her acting arsenal to enliven her performance.

For me the problem with the show was in the humor; it was all too much, too fast, too soon. It was as though the creator and writer tossed everything she could into every second of the show to prove that this sitcom was going to be really, really funny - so stick around and watch, don’t leave, it’s still hilarious!

(more…)

According to USA Today, check out the link below, both Iron Man and Wolverine (with a few X-Peeps) are set to blow up the network early next year!  In my humble fan boy opinion this is way cool for many exciting reasons, and I shall list them briefly here:

1) Now that Kids WB is no longer (yup it’s true) where else are we gonna get our Superhero cartoons from? It’s nice to know there is another network out there willing to step up to the plate (come back to us Cartoon Network!).

2) Having Superheroes on Nicktoons is a rather big change from the Sponge Bobs and Doras normally on the network! If these shows do well we just might be seeing a whole new set of comic inspired awesomeness on some other toony networks (come back Cartoon Network! We need you! Look alive Fox Kids, time to bring in the heroes!)

3) Although I am rather nervous about a teen Iron Man (yes, you read me right, it’s a teenage Iron Man, ugh), and the continuous over-saturation of Wolverine (can’t we just call the show the X-Men?) this can only bode well for the future of the comic book medium. Superhero cartoon shows = more kids growing into comic fans.

4) I just can’t wait to see the White Queen on the Wolverine and the X-Men show, hubba hubba! Let’s see how they get her past the little ones and their impressionable minds.

Check out the full story here: http://www.usatoday.com/life/television/news/2008-03-17-marvel-nicktoons_N.htm