Spoiler Alert: but if you haven’t read Watchmen, why the heck not? I mean, speaking as someone who just read it for the first time herself, after years of being lectured about it, I can tell you honestly that they were all right, everyone who said these words to me.

The Watchmen trailer is beautiful, a comic fan’s wet dream—it’s lush and dark and brooding and scary, and the world is perfect. It gives away a little too much, but that’s not my biggest complaint.

It rubbed me the wrong way only for one reason—the ages are all wrong.
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John Carpenter’s ‘Halloween’ is my favorite movie of all time. Nothing in cinematic history comes remotely close to my love of all things ‘the Shape’; so, you can imagine that I took very special interest when Devil’s Due revealed earlier this year that they would be working together with writer Stefan Hutchinson and Malek Akkad of Compass International Films (a subsidiary of Trancas International Films, Inc.) to produce new Halloween material for fans of the franchise and horror comic fans alike.

Click HERE for a 5 page preview of Halloween: 30 Years of Terror.

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Party affiliations aside, if this doesn’t sum up the November 2008 election, I don’t know what will.

All the blessings in the world to Tom Tomorrow for summing it all up for us.

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[[WARNING! THIS COLUMN MIGHT CONTAIN SPOILERS!]]

“But I can touch you… in a special way.” Red Ghost simian against Wakandan troops.

Welcome to yet another installment of The Dissector; this time for the comics released on the week of 07/23. I have to start, sadly, with a bad news. Those who follow my column know that I’m very fond of, and have been inspired by cartoonist Jeremy Rizza’s humor/comics/fashion blog Blockade Boy; which, unfortunately, he has decided to end. The link will stay on my blog’s sidebar; and I encourage all of you to go and read back on his pasts, since it’s very funny and also shows a great knowledge of comics. Since Blockade Boy is no more; I also recommend you check his upcoming webcomic Viking Zombie Boyfriend, which starts today.
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It’s no secret that Warner Bros. is sitting a superhero goldmine, but has so much trouble getting their material out there. That could soon change, as Warners is readying to revamp how DC’s properties are developed — changes that could be announced within the next month. This article really intrigues me. It’s interesting that they decide this now after Marvel has been doing it for about a decade now. Not all of Marvel films have been as successful and DC knows what failure of a possible franchise-starter feels like (Catwoman) as well as a multi-million dollar reboot (Superman Returns) crash to the ground. Though things could be looking up.
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After watching Robert Kirkman’s video at CBR and reading his rationale following the video, I can only come to one conclusion. Kirkman is either high on crack or so full of himself that he is unable to see the forest from the trees.

Kirkman’s opens his nine minute ramble first by stating that he will save the comic industry, but first he kindly insults creators who actually enjoy writing for DC and Marvel.

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Watch the giant-ass video after the jump, and consider these points . . .

1. Kind of arrogant, ain’t he?

2. Did he really just call Joe Quesada super-brilliant? I think Quesada’s done a pretty good job at Marvel, but super-briliant might be reaching a bit.

3. Has Kirkman ever read a Marvel Adventures comic? I have, and if I don’t feel like I’m being condescended to, I doubt most kids do.

4. I’m sure Kirkman is sincere with most (if not all) of what he’s saying here, but it really does sound like a thinly veiled recruitment video for Image. Either that or a cunning way to get Image to comp a cruise vacation.

5. “It’s a good time for comics”? Yeah, there’s lots of great books out there, and the movies are kicking ass, but have you looked at a sales chart recently? An issue of Nomad from the early 90s sold more copies than the biggest-selling comic right now. Sure, it was at the height of the speculation age, but a lot of people made a lot of money. And given the piss-poor state of the economy right now, how many comic book shops are going to close down before things turn around?

6. I look forward to reading the inevitable flame wars that are likely to ensue in the wake of this video. If gambling weren’t illegal in my state, I’d be taking bets on when Matt Brady’s head is going to explode.

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[[WARNING! THIS COLUMN MIGHT CONTAIN SPOILERS!]]

“Tch. We’re gods, Hercules. Our ancestors mated with everything from animals to clouds to their own siblings.” Snowbird, Incredible Hercules #119.

Well, still behind, but closer to catching up; here’s the column for the week of 07/16. There was no need for me to resort to my vault, since one single issue had thirteen dissections. Nobody guessed the DT!, but then again, I’m posting a column a day almost, so I’m not giving enough time. Several readers said that Cap just took off his mask, or is about to put it on, and that the eyeholes are facing the wrong way. He was taking it off; but people turn hats or other items of clothing around in their hands after removing them…
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“Why couldn’t that isotope have made me deaf instead of blind.” Daredevil, putting up with Spider-Man’s banter, Amazing Spider-Man V1 #565.

Dang, it’s almost Wednesday, which means that I publish a column, and a new comic batch comes out! Anyway, this column is for the week of 07/09; although I had to take some of the dissections from my vault; for one, my dissections from 2004 are over. Dissector’s Picks Of The Week! Best Book Of The Week is Booster Gold V2 #1.000.000; Pure Platinum!!! It was just a good conclusion to a first arc for this great book, with even a happy ending (for now)… just watch the Moments Of The Week and see if I liked this book or what? Worst Book Of The Week? New Exiles #8… boring.
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“Hurry the fuck up down there! Do I need to remind yeh this’s an invasion? Like with pointy swords and people dying and shit?” Unnamed Saxxon commander in the 1100s, Northlanders #7.

Well, that quote up there really broke the suspension of disbelief for me with this book. I don’t expect characters in a comic to speak old Norse or whatnot, but there are some things that just don’t do it… I almost considered this, and another use of the word “fuck” as dissections; but I realized they were just tools the writer uses to carry across emotional points. Last column’s DT! was guessed by Sully; it was that Spider-Woman’s eyes should be green and not blue. Also, the anonymous poster that spotted my “Beast Boy/Cyborg” error from column #80 calls himself DrSilent.
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Brett Ratner is a busy man; he has recently moved to Paramount and while there he wants to make “mainstream tentpole” movies, reports Variety. One of the first two he says he will be working on is Harbinger. From the article: Ratner said after directing “X-Men: The Last Stand,” he was eager to build a superhero franchise from the ground up. Though it should be noted that this past March, it was announced that Paramount Pictures acquired the rights of Harbinger, enlisting Brett Ratner as director. Alexandra Milchan, Jay Stern Dinesh Shamdasani, Jason Kothari and Ratner will all produce. It seems with his departure, they managed to come to some sort of agreement.
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“J’onn J’onzz was my friend. (…) We’ll all miss him. And pray for a resurrection.” Superman, someone finally acknowledges that superheroes never truly die, Final Crisis #2.

Here we go again! Last column’s DT! was guessed by Snakebyte, and he correctly said that Black Canary shouldn’t be talking while using her canary cry. By the way, this column is for books released on 06/25, no older book this time. The Dissector’s Picks Of The Week are as follow: Best Book Of The Week goes to Avengers: The Initiative #14, with a good Secret Invasion tie-in; while the Worst Book Of The Week was Number Of The Beast #6; a potentially good story that has just been drawn out for too long. Three or four issues would have been enough for this… (more…)

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[[WARNING! THIS COLUMN MIGHT CONTAIN SPOILERS!]]

“If there’s one place I didn’t feel like going tonight, it’s Jersey. I might have to stop and get a map… and a mullet.” Spider-Man, Amazing Spider-Man #563.

Once more, here we are, trying to catch up. This column contains dissections for the week of 06/18, plus one from the vault, to complete the minimum ten dissections per column. The Dissector’s Picks Of The Week are the following: Best Book Of The Week was Incredible Hercules #117, you know why, hehehe; and the Worst Book was Kill All Parents #1 (one-shot, really)… just plain awful. Nobody picked up the DT! from last column; so I might as well spill it: Guy Gardner’s boots were colored white, instead of green.
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“Pills for breakfast. I am so science fictional.” Doktor Sleepless, Doktor Sleepless #07.

Okay, so I lost the roll I was on; but I’m still trying to catch up, with this issue being about books released on the week of 06/11, except for a straggler. Last column’s DT! was solved by the Guvnor Paul C, welcome back to active duty! It was indeed the fact that Cannonball calls Lucas Bishop “Nathan”, which is Cable’s name.
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WTF! Sony is developing a spin-off movie for Venom?? Read the whole story here! Can this possibly good?

http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/hr/content_display/news/e3i9603a54f631ae7b0ccc841503f65f11b