Note from The Editors: Sorry this is late; we’ve been having trouble with The Russ’s account. Apparently, he is too awesome for the latest version of WordPress. Here he is in all of his glory.

Umaga defeated Mr. Kennedy in the dark match. Apparently Kennedy mocked Brett Favre before the match. That’s so en vogue these days…

Curt Hawkins & Zack Ryder defeated John Morrison & The Miz, Finlay & Hornswoggle and Jesse & Festus in a Fatal 4-Way Match to become the new WWE Tag Team Champions. This was a nonelimination match. Given the way the wedding storyline finished up last week, I was thinking that La Familia would probably get broken up (or at least side with Vickie Guerrero), but this indicates to me that it will keep going, at least as long as Edge is with them to give them credibility. The finish had Festus cleaning house until Ryder tripped him up and Hawkins threw Jesse off the top rope to get the pin. Kind of an “eh” match, but maybe this will finally give “Biscuits & Gravy” something to chase.

Shelton Benjamin defeated Matt Hardy to become the new WWE U.S. Champion. Thus ends a strange title reign for Hardy. He returned from injury and beat MVP for the title, and then basically was given nothing to do with it. People said that Shelton was sloppy, but this was a great back-and-forth match that the live audience seemed to enjoy, so hopefully they will be given more of a chance to feud.

ECW Champion Mark Henry retained over Tommy Dreamer. Not very exciting. Henry brought Tony Atlas with him, while Dreamer brought Colin Delaney. Well, at least you know who are the black guys and who are the really, really, really white guys, I guess. Atlas repeatedly asked Dreamer how he felt as Mark Henry dismantled him. This would work better if Mick Foley was at ringside daring Dreamer to go hardcore. Anyway, Delaney turned on Dreamer for no apparent reason, allowing the champ to hit Dreamer with a splash for the win. This match had no redeeming value whatsoever.

Chris Jericho defeated Shawn Michaels. I bet this match sold some buys. Michaels bladed towards the end of the match to coincide with the interference of Lance Cade. Don’t these lame seconds remind you of all those New Blood guys that WCW trotted out in front of us with their blood baths? Lance cade got involved plenty, and the ref tried to stop the match a couple of times for the blood, but Michaels continued on. Finally, the ref called the match for blood loss and awarded it to Jericho. After the match, they sell the seriousness of Michaels’ injury. All that and a bag of chips. This was pretty awesome, I’d say.

Backstage, Edge called Triple H a pervert for videotaping him cheating on Vickie with the wedding planner last week. To be honest, you’d think that Vickie would be more careful than to marry a guy who’s on his fifth or sixth marriage and has broke up a few more.

Michelle McCool defeated Natalya Neidhart to become the first WWE Divas Champion. McCool countered a Sharpshooter with a submission move of her own, forcing Neidhart to tap. After the match, other chicks showed up to celebrate until Chris Jericho interrupted to announce that Shawn Michaels just had his last match (people actually cheered) and was suffering from a detached retina. I think that promo was the high point of the match, which doesn’t say much for Undertaker’s girlfriend and Anvil’s daughter.

World Heavyweight Champion CM Punk vs. Batista ended in a double disqualification. This was a pretty good match until Kane had to run in and ruin it, attacking both Punk and Batista to end the match. Kane continued to ask if he’s alive or dead and carried a bag, which everyone on the ‘net believes to be Kane’s mask. To answer Kane, yes, Drew Hankinson is still alive… he’s Festus, and he doesn’t need to be the mask anymore to be the fake Kane. Anyway, this was a great match, but it seemed like a throwaway to put over the Kane storyline. CM Punk tried to celebrate after the match, but Batista powerbombed him in frustration.

John “Bradshaw” Layfield defeated John Cena in a NYC Parking Lot Brawl. If you like matches where all the participants do is stomp, punch, and throw each other into plunder, this Bud’s for you! JBL called Cena out after he arrived to the set, so Cena jumped him and choked him out with some cables. He looked awfully spry after getting hit with a car last week. Later in the match, JBL set a car on fire that Cena was in. They do realize that gas is up to $4 a gallon, don’t they? Cena had fun with a forklift, picking up JBL’s car with him inside it and taking him into the arena, car and all. Cena was about to finish off JBL when he launched Cena into a windshield and won the match.

In the main event, WWE Champion Triple H retained over Edge. Great match, until the broads got involved. That was pretty much what I wrote after every Triple H match between ‘99 and ‘01. Alicia Fox (the wedding planner) ran in and slid the title belt in to Edge, but then Vickie Guerrero ran out and started fighting with her. Edge speared Vickie, then Triple H got the Pedigree and won the match. Afterwards, La Familia is all messed up, while The Game stood tall.

This was a pretty good show from beginning to end, and it made up for the awful Night of Champions PPV. Check out the replay if you get a chance.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, July 29th, 2008 at 10:14 pm and is filed under Russ Ray's Rasslin' Ring, The Russ, Wrestling. You can subscribe via RSS 2.0 feed to this post's comments. You can comment below, or link to this permanent URL from your own site. Your comments will be moderated but will appear as soon as humanly possible.