We’ve always said that “We’re Not Gonna Take It” sounded like “O Come All Ye Faithful.”

Here’s proof.

ROCK!

Mr. J. Medeiros (of the Procussions) talks to your favorite Lyrical Lounge interview queen about “hurt(ing) this pride, murder(ing) this ego”. Here’s a look inside the mind of a (Super)man who ain’t too proud to eat humble pie, just hold the milk - Angelica LeMinh

ALM: Rappelles-moi ton histoire avec la langue francaise….
Mr J: I am still learning French. I know just enough to keep the show going and some extra phrases to get around town. France was the first place I toured (with The Procussions) outside of the U.S. and that was 4 years ago. We go twice almost every year, in fact, I’m here now, about to finish about a 7 week tour…of France.

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DISCLAIMER (angry creators, please read)

[[WARNING! THIS COLUMN MIGHT CONTAIN SPOILERS!]]

“They’re giant insects. Of course they have eye-beams.” Tesladyne field operative, Atomic Robo #02.

What’s going on? Why am I not getting more votes for the Autopsy Awards? This is outrageous! Get your lazy asses over to your e-mails and send those votes (see last column, the third Special for the nominees) to lordmagnusen at gmail.com! Still up to date, here’s the column on last week’s comics, but let me tell you first that NOBODY found the Dissect This! from last week! The problem was that Donna Troy’s boots did not have heels people… I know it’s not Mary Marvel, but still…

Before moving on to the picks, you’ll see something new in the Dissections. Each book title now has the publisher’s name next to it, in parenthesis. Why? Because I had to go over almost 50 columns to see which company had the most dissections; and even though the figures are accurate as to how they relate to each other, they’re still only approximated… and I want to have an easier time counting them for next years Autopsy Awards. Same thing with the authors, I’m going to start counting their dissections after finishing each column, to save myself the trouble next time.
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Marvel and DC have just done their best Scarlet Witch House of M impression.

As of approximately 36 hours ago, the popular comic book only torrent site, ZCult FM, has stopped serving torrents. According to posts made on ZCult’s forums by site-runner “Serj,” the site received a cease and desist letter from both Marvel and DC, indicating some cooperation between the two to get this site taken down. He has been able to confirm the authenticity of the DC letter, but has not directly spoken to anyone from Marvel yet.

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I got your Autopsy Awards nominees right here! The voting will be via e-mail, because I couldn’t manage to set up them damn web polls… Send your votes to lordmagnusen at gmail.com, in the following form (each nomination has a code): “W01, A03, C02…”

Some of the awards are not subject to vote, as they are given solely on a numeric basis (most Dissected company, etc), or specially awarded for extraordinary “merit”. Of course, the text for each dissection is the original one from when they were published, but I’ve added (mostly) new comments for all. Let’s get started with the Best Writing Dissection nominees: (more…)

God only knows how excited I was last Wednesday when I booked from work to head to my favorite Manhattan shop, Forbidden Planet, for the fourth iteration in the spectacular adventures of ex-boyfriend fighting hipster, Scott Pilgrim. For those who have followed this kinetic  soap opera, the annual Scott Pilgrim digests follow the adventures of a 23-year-old slacker who must battle his girlfriend’s seven evil exes in order to stay with her. The amazing thing about Bryan Lee O’Malley’s serials is how they analogize the drama and strife of 20-something dating through over-the-top kung fu fights and playful pop-culture commentary. Who hasn’t ever felt like dragon-punching your significant other’s pretentious vegan ex-boyfriend before head-butting him into oblivion (I’m literally pausing right now to fantasize)? Fortunately, the ridiculous fights are balanced with superb characterization and real affection for these characters, whose quirks are easily found in some of your real-life friends and flames.

Unfortunately, Scott Pilgrim Gets It Together doesn’t live up to the standards of the previous three volumes. The ex he fights in this edition isn’t as memorable as the ex-professional skateboarder or aforementioned telekinetic vegan bass player from volumes past. Likewise, the hilarious parallels between Scott and video-gaming nostalgia are flimsy at best (a digital thirst meter?). My biggest complaint, though, is the characterization behind gay roommate Wallace and the rest of his friends. The characters stray from idiosyncratic lovability into some pretty strange directions that I won’t spoil. Suffice to say, Pilgrim always thrived in its balance between realism and fantasy, but this realism is strained into some tired territory that would fit more into exploitive teenage melodrama than everyone’s favorite Canadian Manga.

That said, I wouldn’t discourage anyone from picking this series up. A lackluster Scott Pilgrim shines brighter than 90% of anything else from the big two. Apparently I’m not alone in my praise for this series, as the stock at Forbidden Planet was clean sold out in hours and I had to travel to St. Mark’s where a lone copy thankfully remained.

DISCLAIMER (angry creators, please read)

[[WARNING! THIS COLUMN MIGHT CONTAIN SPOILERS!]]

“Kid… You’re fired. We get back to Earth, you’re demoted to Excalisuck or some damn team.” Wolverine, to Armor, Astonishing X-Men V3 #23.

Alright, so this column is actually out on time; as I’m finishing it on early Wednesday morning when it’s due on Thursday. Yet, all this rushing to get on track did make me forget that… this past Sunday, November 11th (not 12th, as I said a few weeks ago), was the column’s second birthday!!! Yes, two years ago The Nitpicker’s Column made it’s first appearance, in issue #549 of the now sadly extinct Comic Book Electronic Magazine (or CBEM, for shorts, you can check the still read-worthy archive here).

Editor David LeBlanc generously accepted my offer of writing this new column, and said in his editorial, about the first one “The Emag is also on the move, ever-changing, ever-evolving. After the recent success of COMICS OBSCURA in our pages we were offered another new column which should prove a bit interesting. Some of you may react strongly - either agree or disagree with the analysis offered. My criteria is that it is on topic and written well. Check out THE NITPICKER starting this week and see if you have an opinion.”
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Ira Levin, the masterful writer of suspense classics Rosemary’s Baby, The Boys from Brazil and The Stepford Wives, has died.

If you’ve never read (and I do mean read) his books, do yourself a favor and check them out. Levin was a brilliant plotter and knew how to make every movement count. Fiction is poorer for this loss.

DISCLAIMER (angry creators, please read)

[[WARNING! THIS COLUMN MIGHT CONTAIN SPOILERS!]]

“I’ve got Nazi all over my suit! And I just had it cleaned…” Wildcat (Ted Grant), JSA: Classified 31.

Here I am trying to catch up, so I’ll make the intro to this column (devoted to comics published on 10-13) short and sweet. Last week’s Dissect This! was that Wolverine’s eyes were colored brown, instead of blue. This week’s Dissector’s Pick for Best Book goes to Superman Confidential #8, in which Dan Abnett & Andy Lanning tell a story of Superman’s first meeting with the New Gods, with excellent art by Chris Batista (inked by Cam Smith and colored by Jason Wright), which reminds of me of a good Jack Kirby yarn.
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The companion vlog to our Best Shots column at Newsarama for this week . . .

Outside of perhaps only Marilyn Monroe, no female has been the subject of more mystery and more obsession than Bettie Page.  Page’s career last only about seven years from 1950 to 1957.  During that time Page worked as a model in everything from traditional pin-ups to fully nudes to bondage and fetish motifs.  Page was also the Playboy Playmate of the Month in January, 1955.  Page abruptly left the business in 1957, citing a conversion to Christianity although that has been disputed by many.  What isn’t disputed is the indelible impression she’s made on the males of the species for over fifty years, continuing to enjoy incredible popularity.  If you need further proof, there is this great new release from Dark Horse Books.  This book contains over 300 very rare photos and pieces of art not only of Bettie, but other notable pin-up queens of the 50’s and 60’s such as Sophia Loren, Jayne Mansfield, Mamie Van Doren, Ursula Andress, Brigitte Bardot, and many others.

Many of the Bettie photos were taken by amateur photographers and are being seen for the very first time.  These include both black and white and full color photos, numerous nude shots, and bondage/fetish photos.  This is exhibit A as to why Bettie was and remains so popular.  Despite many of the photos being taken by amateurs, they never come off as seedy.  This is in large part due to the fact that Bettie had that inexplicable next door girl look and always seemed to have a smile on her face no matter what the pose.  The published photos come from such long-forgotten men’s magazines as Eyeful, Tid Bits, Wink, and Titter.  The other interesting thing about Bettie’s photos is their relative innocence.  Again, with many being produced by amateurs they were taken not in studios with sets but rather in everyday homes or apartments and it gives them truly a personal touch.

The book covers the very early period of nudes in magazine and in film including very rare photos from foreign films of the 40’s and 50’s.  There’s a spectacular shot of a topless Sophia Loren from the 1953 Italian film “Two Nights with Cleopatra.”  The 50’s saw an explosion in men’s magazines, which are detailed in the chapter called Pin-up Wars.  There were literally scores of men’s magazines, both domestic and foreign, flooding the marketplace and a competition of sorts began between American and European pin-up models.  Dozens of cover’s are reprinted and it brings home just how voracious this battle became.  There are chapters devoted to the most famous sex symbols:  Marilyn Monroe, Sophia Loren, Bardot, Gina Lollobrigida, and Kim Novak which feature shots from both film and photo sessions.  Finally, the book concludes with the photos that would earn Bettie the notorious label…her bondage and fetish shots, again many being seen for the first time in any collection.

This is an exquisite collection not only for Bettie Page fans, but also for any fan of 50’s and 60’s pin-ups.  The photography is brilliant and artfully reproduced by Dark Horse.

Brilliant!

To see . . . (more…)

NOTE: I’m an idiot, and this column has been in suspended animation as a draft for more than a week. Please forgive me.

DISCLAIMER (angry creators, please read)

[[WARNING! THIS COLUMN MIGHT CONTAIN SPOILERS!]]

“I need a Commodore Sixty-Four.” Hank Pym, Mighty Avengers #5.

Sorry for the lateness, this column is for comics published the week before this one, and should have come out on Thursday or Friday as usual, but I’ve been swamped with a lot of stuff. Let’s get started with the Dissect This!, which was the fact that Hal Jordan is shown after killing Kilowog, but he’s only wearing one power ring, when by then he already had like ten. What are the Dissector’s Picks of the Week, you say? Well, the best book for this week wasn’t published the week in question, but about a month ago or so, and it’s Atomic Robo #1. Yes, it’s a blatant Hellboy rip-off, with a robot instead of a demon, but it’s well written, with snappy dialogue like “Don’t tell me I’m in the wrong mountain base”, and a simple, but engaging plot, all by Brian Clevinger. The art by Scott Wegener is cartoony, in synch with the book’s light tone and the (current) setting of the late 30s, and the colors by Ronda Pattison are clean, but not bland, like I usually complain about similar coloring. Plus, Robo was created by Nikola Tesla, which along with the pulp theme is what drew me to pick up the book… and I don’t regret it.
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DISCLAIMER (angry creators, please read)

[[WARNING! THIS COLUMN MIGHT CONTAIN SPOILERS!]]

“I’m getting lectured on CHILD SAFETY from a man who’s gone through FOUR ROBINS?” Wally West (obviously to Batman), The Flash V2.

Yes, I know, this column is about a week late. My lateness is mostly due to the fact that I’m doing an earlier shift at work, which means I arrive there at a busier hour than before, thus having less free time to write. Also, I’ve been busy with the organization of a charity RPG event last Sunday, which turned out quite well. Check out my deviantArt gallery for pictures of the event, and of Halloween. How was everybody’s Halloween? I had a blast, with a party at home a few days before, a small celebration at work, and trick or treating with my kid for the first time around the neighborhood. In fact, I hadn’t trick or treated since I left the US, back in 1984 was the last time I went out for candy.
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